There's an old song about this. It's called "Torn Between Two Lovers." The song talks about how "loving you both is breaking all the rules." I can guess you know how that feels.
The problem with cheating and falling in love with the other man is that you can't just turn off the love you have for your husband. The bigger problem is that you aren't going to get a lot of sympathy from others for your plight. This means that you are largely on your own to figure out what to do and where to go from here.
Here are a few questions you should ask yourself to help you decide what your next move will be.
1)What is it that the other man offers you that you aren't getting from your husband? You need to identify whatever it is that you're getting from the other man. The sooner you do that, the better.
2)Is your husband capable of meeting this need and giving you whatever it is that you're getting from the other man at the moment? Men don't read minds. If it's something your husband is capable of giving you all you really need to do is ask. He wants you to be happy. If it's within his power to make you happy there's no reason you should be turning to another man for that happiness (of course you need to decide whether you're going to tell him about the other man or not before you ask your husband to meet your needs).
3)Can the other man give you whatever it is that your husband gives you? While it's almost always best to try and work things out with your marriage it's also wise to know the score and do the right thing for everyone involved instead of doing what you think is the moral choice.
4)Would the other man be interested in pursuing an exclusive relationship with you? Perhaps he likes the fact that you're married and not likely to want a commitment with him. It's a good idea to find out for sure before you risk your marriage further.
5)Do you really love the other man or do you just love the way the other man makes you feel. There is a huge difference between the two. The odds are good that you have a genuine love for your husband or you wouldn't have married him in the first place. Are you willing to risk that real love for something that might not be true?
Think you made the wrong decision when you decided to leave your husband? It's not too late to get your husband back but it isn't going to be easy.
The problem with cheating and falling in love with the other man is that you can't just turn off the love you have for your husband. The bigger problem is that you aren't going to get a lot of sympathy from others for your plight. This means that you are largely on your own to figure out what to do and where to go from here.
Here are a few questions you should ask yourself to help you decide what your next move will be.
1)What is it that the other man offers you that you aren't getting from your husband? You need to identify whatever it is that you're getting from the other man. The sooner you do that, the better.
2)Is your husband capable of meeting this need and giving you whatever it is that you're getting from the other man at the moment? Men don't read minds. If it's something your husband is capable of giving you all you really need to do is ask. He wants you to be happy. If it's within his power to make you happy there's no reason you should be turning to another man for that happiness (of course you need to decide whether you're going to tell him about the other man or not before you ask your husband to meet your needs).
3)Can the other man give you whatever it is that your husband gives you? While it's almost always best to try and work things out with your marriage it's also wise to know the score and do the right thing for everyone involved instead of doing what you think is the moral choice.
4)Would the other man be interested in pursuing an exclusive relationship with you? Perhaps he likes the fact that you're married and not likely to want a commitment with him. It's a good idea to find out for sure before you risk your marriage further.
5)Do you really love the other man or do you just love the way the other man makes you feel. There is a huge difference between the two. The odds are good that you have a genuine love for your husband or you wouldn't have married him in the first place. Are you willing to risk that real love for something that might not be true?
Think you made the wrong decision when you decided to leave your husband? It's not too late to get your husband back but it isn't going to be easy.