Having to deal with rejection is one of those things that is hard for someone to move on from.
Nevertheless generally speaking we all have to deal with at one time or another in our lives.
How we cope with that rejection is the key to our success in relationships.
Generally like most fears, they originate from past experiences which were unpleasant or negative for us.
Nobody likes to experience pain, embarrassment or any other kind of negative feeling more than necessary, and so it is built into us as human beings to try to stay away from these things as much as possible.
Very much like the first time you touched a hot oven (come on I know you must have done it at one time or another).
You discovered very quickly that it hurt (a lot!), and so you ensured that you did not repeat the same mistake very often.
People who have experienced some form of rejection relationships will generally follow the same pattern, and try to avoid that rejection feeling again.
However the ramifications of that, are that it will impact the way that person deals with relationships from then on.
They might become more insular when it comes to meeting other potential companions.
They may become quieter, more negative about people, and sometimes even avoid any contact with the opposite sex at all.
If they manage overcome the fear of rejection enough to begin another relationship, the fear, if not dealt with properly will often be the cause of numerous problems within that relationship.
For example if one partner is a little snappy when they get home from work, and doesn't really feel like talking, or is not as "cuddly" as normal, the other partner can take that as a form of another rejection and become very defensive, and so a row ensues.
Needless to say it may be that their spouse is just a little cranky because they had a bad day at the office.
A previously rejected person can also become very possessive or jealous or their partner.
Not because they are a bad person, but because they so want to avoid that pain of rejection again that they can become hyper sensitive to very innocent situations, and through their reactions cause a breakdown of communications.
So what is the remedy? Initially we must understand that rejection is mostly a single isolated incident.
Because one girl you went to talk to in a club turned down your advances, it does not suggest the following will as well.
In fact you could go on twenty different dates before meeting someone who you genuinely click with.
What would happen if after the third or sixth rejection you stopped trying to date anyone? Of course you would have missed out on successful date number twenty.
So the very first thing to remember is that the past does not equal the future.
If a past spouse left you for another person, it does not mean that it will occur again.
It takes time to get over getting hurt.
However with time, it will get better and we have to go into any relationship with an open mind and clean slate.
Carrying around the fear of future rejection is only going to ever hinder our future relationships.
Fear is of course our friend, in that it can help us avoid certain dangers in life.
Avoiding relationships because of past rejections however, will stop you enjoying the joy and happiness that finding that special someone can bring.
Remember life is too short, you should always try your best to live your life to the fullest and live each day like it was your last.