Tips for Getting Over Your Fear of Commitment
The Fear of Commitment – How to Overcome It.
1. Ask yourself why you're so afraid of committing. Where did that fear of commitment stem from? Once you have the answers and you understand them, it is only then that you can overcome it.
2. Are those reasons acceptable? (i.e. my parents didn't work out so I fear it may happen to me too) Just because things happened to the people you love doesn't mean it has to happen to you. You can learn from the past events that made you fear commitments. They happen to others so that you learn from them and not repeat the process. You don't want a failed relationship? Do what it takes to make it succeed.
3. Approach your relationship problems with a positive attitude. There are reasons why you are with your special someone and it's a fact of life that your relationship will hit occasional bumps along the way. Do not fear nor hate them, approach them as a component of making your relationship stronger.
4. Communicate. Are you thinking you might not be able to have those Friday night poker games with your buddies once you commit to your relationship? Talk with them about the changes you'll go through and learn to compromise where it's needed.
5. Set rules. Lay down the do's and don'ts early on in your relationship. You should both know what ticks off the other and it allows for both of you to commit to your relationship because neither of you will suffocate the other.
6. If you're the type of person who fears commitment because you fear that all your hard earned money will be spent senselessly because of your partner, have a relationship check. Is your partner that kind of person? If they are and you're not willing to give up on the relationship because of that, deal with it by talking to them about it.
7. Some people develop that fear of commitment after a failed relationship. One that they've invested so much in such as joint properties and businesses, a marriage or even children and have lost all of it in the process of separation. If you've went through this, give yourself time to learn how to trust again. Being with someone isn't always stressful and won't always lead to a divorce until you allow for it to happen. A good way to avoid mishaps happening to you twice is by setting your focus on your relationship mistakes and straightening them out.
8. Ask yourself: "Do I want to be in a strong and healthy relationship?" If your answer is yes but you fear in committing to it, you have to accept the simple fact that you cannot establish a strong and healthy relationship with an unbalanced level of commitment. You cannot achieve that relationship status if you commit to the relationship by 20-80.
Dealing with the fear of commitment is the first and biggest step in overcoming it. Initiating to take that first step to understanding and accepting why you have that fear will have the biggest impact on your process of prevailing over it. Once you accept and understand the facts of why you have that fear to commit will make it easier for you to understand yourself as it allows for your relationship to progress.