When Barack Obama was campaigning for the presidency in 2008 he was advised by his staff to change one of his gestures.
He had a habit of pointing his index finger at the audience when he was making a point.
Obama was advised to change that gesture to just holding up his index finger.
What's the difference? In the first instance when he made a point his finger was pointing at people, sending an unspoken message that he was blaming or scolding or telling people what to do.
Most people don't like anyone pointing fingers at them.
In the new gesture he holds up his finger to emphasize that he's making a point but no one feels blamed or singled out.
You'll probably never be in the position of giving speeches as tightly scripted and choreographed as this, but this story is certainly an example of the importance of non-verbal communication.
Our gestures are as important as our words when we are speaking.
In fact, research shows that over half of our communication with others is non-verbal.
Yet when new speakers step onto the podium they suddenly become self-conscious about their gestures and don't know what to do with their hands.
This causes the speaker to look stilted.
Because of this it's important when you are practicing to consider the appropriate gestures that will accompany your words.
First, let's look at gestures and body language that need to be avoided when you speak.
An easy way to see these is to make a video recording of yourself speaking.
Play the video without sound.
This makes your body language easy to see.
It's painful to watch, but worth it! There are some body movements and gestures that can be annoying or distracting to an audience.
Some speakers roll back on their heels, sway or pace.
Men have a tendency to jiggle their change in their pocket.
Males and females both fiddle with rings, watches and other jewelry.
In general when you're speaking keep your hands away from your face and hair.
One of the most effective ways to eliminate these distracting mannerisms, in addition to videotaping yourself, is to ask a friend to keep track of them for you.
Hearing how many times you repeat a particular gesture can make you much more aware of it.
When you are trying to stop a particular behavior it will cause you to be somewhat awkward when speaking.
But it will become natural with practice.
And your audience will thank you! I took a photography class from a young man who continually played with a plastic water bottle while instructing.
He'd take off the cap, take a quick sip, recap the bottle and the make the plastic bottle "pop" by squeezing it.
Then he'd repeat the process- hundreds of times.
I dearly wanted to take his water bottle away from him and throw it in the trash! Any prospective speech benefits when you look at the entire package- your spoken words as well as your unspoken communication.
a speaker can't get her message out effectively unless she is seen as sincere.
If your words sound sincere but your mannerisms send a different message your speech will fall flat.
I suggest you create your speech first and give it once looking in a mirror.
See what gestures seem natural and spontaneous.
Those natural gestures are what you want to keep in your speech.
Don't use overblown gestures that seem phony.
And don't stand stiffly with your hands at your side.
Do what feels natural.
The good news is that people's fears about what to do with their hands usually disappear once they get into their speech.
They forget about their hands and their gestures become natural.
Gestures and body language can be very effective in reinforcing your points.
Many people feel too self-conscious to watch themselves on tape.
But, look at it this way.
Everyone in your audience has to watch you so you might as well see how you're coming across to them!
He had a habit of pointing his index finger at the audience when he was making a point.
Obama was advised to change that gesture to just holding up his index finger.
What's the difference? In the first instance when he made a point his finger was pointing at people, sending an unspoken message that he was blaming or scolding or telling people what to do.
Most people don't like anyone pointing fingers at them.
In the new gesture he holds up his finger to emphasize that he's making a point but no one feels blamed or singled out.
You'll probably never be in the position of giving speeches as tightly scripted and choreographed as this, but this story is certainly an example of the importance of non-verbal communication.
Our gestures are as important as our words when we are speaking.
In fact, research shows that over half of our communication with others is non-verbal.
Yet when new speakers step onto the podium they suddenly become self-conscious about their gestures and don't know what to do with their hands.
This causes the speaker to look stilted.
Because of this it's important when you are practicing to consider the appropriate gestures that will accompany your words.
First, let's look at gestures and body language that need to be avoided when you speak.
An easy way to see these is to make a video recording of yourself speaking.
Play the video without sound.
This makes your body language easy to see.
It's painful to watch, but worth it! There are some body movements and gestures that can be annoying or distracting to an audience.
Some speakers roll back on their heels, sway or pace.
Men have a tendency to jiggle their change in their pocket.
Males and females both fiddle with rings, watches and other jewelry.
In general when you're speaking keep your hands away from your face and hair.
One of the most effective ways to eliminate these distracting mannerisms, in addition to videotaping yourself, is to ask a friend to keep track of them for you.
Hearing how many times you repeat a particular gesture can make you much more aware of it.
When you are trying to stop a particular behavior it will cause you to be somewhat awkward when speaking.
But it will become natural with practice.
And your audience will thank you! I took a photography class from a young man who continually played with a plastic water bottle while instructing.
He'd take off the cap, take a quick sip, recap the bottle and the make the plastic bottle "pop" by squeezing it.
Then he'd repeat the process- hundreds of times.
I dearly wanted to take his water bottle away from him and throw it in the trash! Any prospective speech benefits when you look at the entire package- your spoken words as well as your unspoken communication.
a speaker can't get her message out effectively unless she is seen as sincere.
If your words sound sincere but your mannerisms send a different message your speech will fall flat.
I suggest you create your speech first and give it once looking in a mirror.
See what gestures seem natural and spontaneous.
Those natural gestures are what you want to keep in your speech.
Don't use overblown gestures that seem phony.
And don't stand stiffly with your hands at your side.
Do what feels natural.
The good news is that people's fears about what to do with their hands usually disappear once they get into their speech.
They forget about their hands and their gestures become natural.
Gestures and body language can be very effective in reinforcing your points.
Many people feel too self-conscious to watch themselves on tape.
But, look at it this way.
Everyone in your audience has to watch you so you might as well see how you're coming across to them!