Why Is It So Hard To Meditate? Three Common Blocks - Plus Ten Strategies For Creating A Daily Practi
All our miseries derive from not being able to sit in a quiet room alone
– Blaise Pascal
Why is it so hard to dedicate a few minutes a day to still, reflective time?
Virtually every client I have worked with has come with the belief that some kind of meditation would be beneficial for them yet has found it inordinately difficult to set it as a daily practice.
Here are three of the most common blocks – which can you identify with?
“It’s only ten minutes, how can that have any useful benefit?”
We seem wary of the simple approaches; we somehow have more trust in complicated, hard-to-reach remedies, like a retreat halfway around the world.
“I don’t HAVE ten minutes to spare. I’m a busy person and must use my time productively”
With our fast-paced life, any time off the treadmill and away from the to-do list can feel like professional suicide. “It’s dull and boring” Behind this is often a fear that WE are dull and boring; we panic about spending time with ourselves in the dark with no distractions.
So here are some strategies that my clients (and I) have found helpful in creating a daily practice:
1. Prepare a designated space the evening before: perhaps with a cushion, a candle and matches.
2. Use a timer so that you can relax into a finite ‘zone’.
3. Make a conditional rule for yourself. Hate that morning taste in your mouth? Set yourself a ‘rule’ that you have your ten minutes before you are allowed to brush your teeth.
4. Build it into your existing routine and ritualise it. If you always set your alarm for a five minute snooze in the morning, extend it to fifteen and move to a seated position for ten of those minutes, or decide that the first ten minutes of your commute is for your practice.
5. Use a prop, like an audio recording of a visualisation.
6. Give it a different name. Perhaps ‘Meditation’ feels serious and dutiful whereas ‘My Free Gift’ sounds sparkling and delightful.
7. Make it delicious. Burn vanilla incense and wrap a soft blanket around yourself.
8. If it all feels too indulgent, make it about others. Focus on it making you calmer in your work life or with your partner.
9. Buddy up. Ask your child or colleague to join you every morning.
10. Do it now. I have sat with a client in reflective silence in a coaching session, or asked my client to put the phone down and take a ‘time out’ chi kung break and then call me back. Having that visceral experience can make you more likely to want to repeat it.
It can also be helpful to remember that an agitated mind is repelled by anything which might calm it. Knowing this means we can acknowledge the resistance when it comes up and remember what our purpose is in instilling this habit – be it more calm, more effectiveness or more spiritual connection.
Some questions to ask yourself:
1) Would you like a daily practice? What would be its purpose?
2) What is your most common block?
Action step: Experiment with one of the ten strategies (and then another…. and another…..) and with other strategies until you find a ‘click’.
Before you go, leave a comment on this article letting us know how you are doing with creating a daily practice. What are your struggles? What strategies suit you?
© Corrina Gordon-Barnes, 2009
– Blaise Pascal
Why is it so hard to dedicate a few minutes a day to still, reflective time?
Virtually every client I have worked with has come with the belief that some kind of meditation would be beneficial for them yet has found it inordinately difficult to set it as a daily practice.
Here are three of the most common blocks – which can you identify with?
“It’s only ten minutes, how can that have any useful benefit?”
We seem wary of the simple approaches; we somehow have more trust in complicated, hard-to-reach remedies, like a retreat halfway around the world.
“I don’t HAVE ten minutes to spare. I’m a busy person and must use my time productively”
With our fast-paced life, any time off the treadmill and away from the to-do list can feel like professional suicide. “It’s dull and boring” Behind this is often a fear that WE are dull and boring; we panic about spending time with ourselves in the dark with no distractions.
So here are some strategies that my clients (and I) have found helpful in creating a daily practice:
1. Prepare a designated space the evening before: perhaps with a cushion, a candle and matches.
2. Use a timer so that you can relax into a finite ‘zone’.
3. Make a conditional rule for yourself. Hate that morning taste in your mouth? Set yourself a ‘rule’ that you have your ten minutes before you are allowed to brush your teeth.
4. Build it into your existing routine and ritualise it. If you always set your alarm for a five minute snooze in the morning, extend it to fifteen and move to a seated position for ten of those minutes, or decide that the first ten minutes of your commute is for your practice.
5. Use a prop, like an audio recording of a visualisation.
6. Give it a different name. Perhaps ‘Meditation’ feels serious and dutiful whereas ‘My Free Gift’ sounds sparkling and delightful.
7. Make it delicious. Burn vanilla incense and wrap a soft blanket around yourself.
8. If it all feels too indulgent, make it about others. Focus on it making you calmer in your work life or with your partner.
9. Buddy up. Ask your child or colleague to join you every morning.
10. Do it now. I have sat with a client in reflective silence in a coaching session, or asked my client to put the phone down and take a ‘time out’ chi kung break and then call me back. Having that visceral experience can make you more likely to want to repeat it.
It can also be helpful to remember that an agitated mind is repelled by anything which might calm it. Knowing this means we can acknowledge the resistance when it comes up and remember what our purpose is in instilling this habit – be it more calm, more effectiveness or more spiritual connection.
Some questions to ask yourself:
1) Would you like a daily practice? What would be its purpose?
2) What is your most common block?
Action step: Experiment with one of the ten strategies (and then another…. and another…..) and with other strategies until you find a ‘click’.
Before you go, leave a comment on this article letting us know how you are doing with creating a daily practice. What are your struggles? What strategies suit you?
© Corrina Gordon-Barnes, 2009