Have you ever preached something to your kids or friends and then realized you did the exact opposite? Yeah, me too.
One of my dear childhood friends called to arrange the details of our impending weekend together. She mentioned looking forward to seeing me and went on to share how I always uplifted her with my positive outlook.
I am learning to allow compliments soak in instead of quickly commenting "Aw, shucks; who me?" But I swallowed hard because just an hour before, I had talked with my coach after having a mini melt-down. We laughed together as I confessed to my friend that she might have a different opinion if she had called me the day before.
I can't remember what exactly caused my emotional dip—probably one of those "thought snow balls that go down hill." It works like this: you hear something negative on TV (what a surprise), it connects with a hot button, which touches off a fear; as it picks up speed, panic sets in and all of a sudden you are imagining the worst possible scenario that surely will befall you if not today, then tomorrow. Yikes!
Now that I am a Life Coach, I hear myself saying "I should know better." Fortunately, I gave myself some slack and smiled that I am human after all. I accept the fact that I will continue to have challenging moments, but I now have a trusty tool kit to help me out of those valleys. Here are a few suggestions you can use:
Emotion detector. Get in touch with what you're feeling, rather than burying it alive. Imagine the process like using a metal detector for lost coins buried on a sandy beach. Sometimes, however you can't identify your feeling. Give yourself permission, space and time to be in the "not knowing." When the time is right, you'll figure it out.
Phone a friend. Have you ever noticed how having a trusted friend listen to you automatically down-sizes your problem? Why then, do we still keep our fears, pains and sorrows to ourselves? Does one of these sound familiar? "They they won't understand." I'm too embarrassed (for having this problem or feeling)," or my personal favorite " I don't want to bother anyone."
Remember the very act of sharing your thoughts and feelings help release its intensity. No friends available? Let your fingers do the talking--write it down in a journal or notebook. No one needs to ever read it and you don't have to worry about your grammar or spelling errors.
Get physical. Remember Olivia Newton John's song, "Let's get physical?" Exercising or simply taking a walk often goes a long way in giving you enough space to meditate, pray or just "be."
Do what you can. I often refer to the Serenity Prayer and ask if there is anything I can do to improve the situation. If so, do it and let the rest go. Yes, yes, I know this sounds simple, but we all know that isn't always easy.
Try on some new thoughts. We think nothing of spending a lot of time finding a pair of shoes that look great and fit perfectly so they don't hurt us when we wear them. How much time do you spend "trying on" thoughts that take you where you want to go? We have control over our thoughts. Create thoughts that focus on what you want in your life; not on what you don't want.
Give yourself a hug. If you're like me, you create impossible standards for you to live by. I am learning to give as much compassion for myself as I do for the other people I love. Are you?
Life can sometimes feel like a roller coaster ride and it's unrealistic to believe you will never experience emotional dips. But by being tuned-in to your thoughts and feelings, you can find your way back to peace and joy within a shorter period of time.
The Serenity Prayer is helpful in so many situations:
"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference. "
One of my dear childhood friends called to arrange the details of our impending weekend together. She mentioned looking forward to seeing me and went on to share how I always uplifted her with my positive outlook.
I am learning to allow compliments soak in instead of quickly commenting "Aw, shucks; who me?" But I swallowed hard because just an hour before, I had talked with my coach after having a mini melt-down. We laughed together as I confessed to my friend that she might have a different opinion if she had called me the day before.
I can't remember what exactly caused my emotional dip—probably one of those "thought snow balls that go down hill." It works like this: you hear something negative on TV (what a surprise), it connects with a hot button, which touches off a fear; as it picks up speed, panic sets in and all of a sudden you are imagining the worst possible scenario that surely will befall you if not today, then tomorrow. Yikes!
Now that I am a Life Coach, I hear myself saying "I should know better." Fortunately, I gave myself some slack and smiled that I am human after all. I accept the fact that I will continue to have challenging moments, but I now have a trusty tool kit to help me out of those valleys. Here are a few suggestions you can use:
Emotion detector. Get in touch with what you're feeling, rather than burying it alive. Imagine the process like using a metal detector for lost coins buried on a sandy beach. Sometimes, however you can't identify your feeling. Give yourself permission, space and time to be in the "not knowing." When the time is right, you'll figure it out.
Phone a friend. Have you ever noticed how having a trusted friend listen to you automatically down-sizes your problem? Why then, do we still keep our fears, pains and sorrows to ourselves? Does one of these sound familiar? "They they won't understand." I'm too embarrassed (for having this problem or feeling)," or my personal favorite " I don't want to bother anyone."
Remember the very act of sharing your thoughts and feelings help release its intensity. No friends available? Let your fingers do the talking--write it down in a journal or notebook. No one needs to ever read it and you don't have to worry about your grammar or spelling errors.
Get physical. Remember Olivia Newton John's song, "Let's get physical?" Exercising or simply taking a walk often goes a long way in giving you enough space to meditate, pray or just "be."
Do what you can. I often refer to the Serenity Prayer and ask if there is anything I can do to improve the situation. If so, do it and let the rest go. Yes, yes, I know this sounds simple, but we all know that isn't always easy.
Try on some new thoughts. We think nothing of spending a lot of time finding a pair of shoes that look great and fit perfectly so they don't hurt us when we wear them. How much time do you spend "trying on" thoughts that take you where you want to go? We have control over our thoughts. Create thoughts that focus on what you want in your life; not on what you don't want.
Give yourself a hug. If you're like me, you create impossible standards for you to live by. I am learning to give as much compassion for myself as I do for the other people I love. Are you?
Life can sometimes feel like a roller coaster ride and it's unrealistic to believe you will never experience emotional dips. But by being tuned-in to your thoughts and feelings, you can find your way back to peace and joy within a shorter period of time.
The Serenity Prayer is helpful in so many situations:
"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference. "