equal parenting, shared parenting, joint custody, divorce and custody, father"s rights, fathers righ
- I could lose one of my children tomorrow at the whim of a drunk driver. My child could be taken from me due to illness. The same holds true for any parent. That knowledge hasn’t kept me from becoming emotionally involved with my children.
- Parental instinct and love is not based on what someone else may choose to do down the road. It is natural for the majority of mothers and fathers, an instant bond from the moment of birth that has nothing to do with the whims of another person.
- I don’t personally know of a father who looked at their child shortly after birth and thought to themselves, "I better not become emotionally involved because your mother may one day decide to leave me for another man."
- Men are not losing contact with children and becoming less involved in their lives due to a woman’s “whims.” Men are losing contact and becoming less involved because of antiquated and faulty divorce laws. They are losing contact because they have been taught not to fight, to avoid conflict and to walk away.
- When men who want to remain a constant in their child’s life let go of the ingrained belief that engaging in conflict with a woman is wrong and become more willing to stand up for what they want, they will then remain a constant in their child’s life.
I may not agree with all that Dr. Farrell writes but we are in agreement when it comes to the value both parents play in a child’s life. From what I have read so far, Dr. Farrell seems to believe that men and their relationships with their children depend on the "whims" of some woman and as a woman and mother I take offense and sincerely disagree with some of his ideas.
I recently had an email from an angry father whose ex-wife had moved away with his two daughters. The father said, "Rather than put my daughters, and myself, through a legal battle when my wife wanted to move away, I let them go and have taken on the entire burden of staying in touch with them. This is tremendously expensive and disruptive."
He chose not to take advantage of laws that would have kept his ex-wife from moving but in his mind all the expense and burden is his ex-wife’s fault. He didn’t want to put himself and his daughters through a legal battle and now he is suffering the consequences but it is his wife’s fault. He made a choice but is refusing to take "responsibility" for that choice.
I applaud all the men who are fighting for the right to equally parent their child/children. I hope your fight will one day mean a child’s best interest is the only concern of every parent in this country and especially the court system.
To finally get to that point fathers like the one above have to start choosing to fight and stand up for what should be their legal parenting rights. Legal battle or no legal battle.