I recently underwent a massive change to my way of thinking.
The epiphany happened slowly, but came to a head when my brother and I were discussing personal hobbies that we each were letting go: "There are things," he said, "That add to your life, and things that are a drain on your life.
I just want to get rid of all the junk that leeches creativity and energy out of me without giving me any benefit in return.
" While this may sound like a highly enlightened new way of thinking, in my opinion it is the devolution of the old 20th century mindset.
Our collective society cries out, "Buy! Keep! Collect! What if it becomes valuable? What if you need it? What if Aunt Petunia comes over and asks what happened to the honey jar she gave you from her garage sale pile?" There is so much societal association between possessions and happiness that we cling to the things in our lives that simply drain us of our desire to do...
well...
anything! Compulsion to Clutter I have a good friend who has a shopping compulsion.
While I hope to address compulsive shopping in another article, it does tend to lead to clutter.
This particular friend has boxes and boxes of makeup she never uses, piles and piles of clothes she has purchased but never worn, drawers stuffed full of lotions she has used once or twice, but never used up.
Another friend of mine expressed her concern about her husband's parents passing away in the future, "They have so much stuff.
They have medicine bottles that are two decades old but they never throw them out.
" The mother of another friend would come home from the dollar store having spent over a hundred dollars in one trip; a regular occurrence in their family.
She had literally a dozen 60-quart plastic tubs full of Christmas decorations.
What is it about having things that makes us feel secure, even to the point that we will refuse to get rid of a broken appliance or keep boxes of old pens and pencils that we never use? Why do magazines like Real Simple sell millions of copies annually by filling their pages with articles on organization and tidiness, rather than tips on how to stop buying? The answer is not a "real simple" one, and more often than not our attachment to things (with a lower-case "t") is an emotional one.
We keep items out of insecurity, fear, and, sometimes, genuine happiness.
We buy and keep things that we think will make us happy.
Whether it is just one more type of blush, medicine that expired five years ago, or another wooden snow man, each of those items, when we put it in the cabinet or on the shelf, symbolizes the happiness we are trying to achieve in our lives.
But do they really bring happiness, all these things? Nothing More Than Feelings The truth is one you probably already know, but have heard so many times that it has lost its power to impress you.
The fact that money cannot buy happiness, that things cannot make you feel secure...
There are no words new enough, is no turn of phrase witty enough to make it a new concept all over again.
Or is there? Look around your home.
When you do, does a feeling of accomplishment, an air of tidiness dominate? Do you feel like you have the things you want and there is nothing out of place, no item that you are keeping "just in case?" If so, feel free to skip this article and move right on to another one of interest.
But if you are reading this article, chances are there is something about your environment that makes you feel uneasy, unable to relax, or downright suffocated.
You may dream of having the ability to actually have a clean home with a minimum of effort.
You have probably heard of the half-hour clean-up, but believe it is a mythical beast like a unicorn or griffin.
If that is the case, consider viewing each of your possessions on an individual basis in light of this attitude: Does this item add peace and happiness to my life, or does it create a feeling of unease? This may sound like a bizarre mystical kind of idea, but the truth is, everything you have does create either a positive or negative feeling inside of you when you look at it, use it, wear it, sit on it, or touch it.
This is not a statement of an enlightened mind, but simply an observation.
Whether your taste runs toward the minimalist bent or toward the profoundly eclectic, something about each item around you sparks an emotional response.
You may have to think a little harder about some items than others to determine which feeling they arouse, but ultimately, you like or dislike every individual item in your home.
Don't believe me? Have a good long look at the broken can opener on your kitchen counter: the one you see and think, "I wish I had the money to buy a new one of those.
" Not a warm-fuzzy feeling, is it? How relaxed you feel in your surroundings is directly related to the number of things in your environment that you like or dislike.
I want to take a moment to put my foot down hard on the brakes and add a disclaimer: That does not mean that the only way you can feel relaxed is to spend thousands of dollars to create an ideal environment.
These Are NOT Your Children What it does mean, however, is that the things in your home that cause that little prickle of unhappiness when you see them; the dried roses you keep from your ex-boyfriend from ten years ago; the lime green glass bowl that your Aunt Petunia gave you for your wedding; the framed pictures of your third cousins that clutter up the top of your piano; all these Things are really just things.
(More on capital "T" Things later.
) They are not people.
They will not have their feelings hurt if you donate them to Goodwill.
They will not call up Aunt Petunia from the donation drop-off and tell her you have put them up for adoption.
They are simply things...
things that often create a negative feeling when you think about them.
Minimalism in the strictest sense is all about keeping only what is necessary for life.
However, most of us have emotional attachments to at least one item in our home, making minimalism not only impractical, but unappealing.
However, the idea of de-cluttering your life begins by recognizing that there are things in your home that you do not need and probably do not even want, but you hang onto them for some reason that you may not even be able to easily explain to yourself.
When you can recognize that not every thing you own is necessary for your current or future happiness, you are ready to take the first tangible step toward de-cluttering your home and possibly even your life.
To find out more, read De-Cluttering Part 2: The Miracle of Sorting Bins.
The epiphany happened slowly, but came to a head when my brother and I were discussing personal hobbies that we each were letting go: "There are things," he said, "That add to your life, and things that are a drain on your life.
I just want to get rid of all the junk that leeches creativity and energy out of me without giving me any benefit in return.
" While this may sound like a highly enlightened new way of thinking, in my opinion it is the devolution of the old 20th century mindset.
Our collective society cries out, "Buy! Keep! Collect! What if it becomes valuable? What if you need it? What if Aunt Petunia comes over and asks what happened to the honey jar she gave you from her garage sale pile?" There is so much societal association between possessions and happiness that we cling to the things in our lives that simply drain us of our desire to do...
well...
anything! Compulsion to Clutter I have a good friend who has a shopping compulsion.
While I hope to address compulsive shopping in another article, it does tend to lead to clutter.
This particular friend has boxes and boxes of makeup she never uses, piles and piles of clothes she has purchased but never worn, drawers stuffed full of lotions she has used once or twice, but never used up.
Another friend of mine expressed her concern about her husband's parents passing away in the future, "They have so much stuff.
They have medicine bottles that are two decades old but they never throw them out.
" The mother of another friend would come home from the dollar store having spent over a hundred dollars in one trip; a regular occurrence in their family.
She had literally a dozen 60-quart plastic tubs full of Christmas decorations.
What is it about having things that makes us feel secure, even to the point that we will refuse to get rid of a broken appliance or keep boxes of old pens and pencils that we never use? Why do magazines like Real Simple sell millions of copies annually by filling their pages with articles on organization and tidiness, rather than tips on how to stop buying? The answer is not a "real simple" one, and more often than not our attachment to things (with a lower-case "t") is an emotional one.
We keep items out of insecurity, fear, and, sometimes, genuine happiness.
We buy and keep things that we think will make us happy.
Whether it is just one more type of blush, medicine that expired five years ago, or another wooden snow man, each of those items, when we put it in the cabinet or on the shelf, symbolizes the happiness we are trying to achieve in our lives.
But do they really bring happiness, all these things? Nothing More Than Feelings The truth is one you probably already know, but have heard so many times that it has lost its power to impress you.
The fact that money cannot buy happiness, that things cannot make you feel secure...
There are no words new enough, is no turn of phrase witty enough to make it a new concept all over again.
Or is there? Look around your home.
When you do, does a feeling of accomplishment, an air of tidiness dominate? Do you feel like you have the things you want and there is nothing out of place, no item that you are keeping "just in case?" If so, feel free to skip this article and move right on to another one of interest.
But if you are reading this article, chances are there is something about your environment that makes you feel uneasy, unable to relax, or downright suffocated.
You may dream of having the ability to actually have a clean home with a minimum of effort.
You have probably heard of the half-hour clean-up, but believe it is a mythical beast like a unicorn or griffin.
If that is the case, consider viewing each of your possessions on an individual basis in light of this attitude: Does this item add peace and happiness to my life, or does it create a feeling of unease? This may sound like a bizarre mystical kind of idea, but the truth is, everything you have does create either a positive or negative feeling inside of you when you look at it, use it, wear it, sit on it, or touch it.
This is not a statement of an enlightened mind, but simply an observation.
Whether your taste runs toward the minimalist bent or toward the profoundly eclectic, something about each item around you sparks an emotional response.
You may have to think a little harder about some items than others to determine which feeling they arouse, but ultimately, you like or dislike every individual item in your home.
Don't believe me? Have a good long look at the broken can opener on your kitchen counter: the one you see and think, "I wish I had the money to buy a new one of those.
" Not a warm-fuzzy feeling, is it? How relaxed you feel in your surroundings is directly related to the number of things in your environment that you like or dislike.
I want to take a moment to put my foot down hard on the brakes and add a disclaimer: That does not mean that the only way you can feel relaxed is to spend thousands of dollars to create an ideal environment.
These Are NOT Your Children What it does mean, however, is that the things in your home that cause that little prickle of unhappiness when you see them; the dried roses you keep from your ex-boyfriend from ten years ago; the lime green glass bowl that your Aunt Petunia gave you for your wedding; the framed pictures of your third cousins that clutter up the top of your piano; all these Things are really just things.
(More on capital "T" Things later.
) They are not people.
They will not have their feelings hurt if you donate them to Goodwill.
They will not call up Aunt Petunia from the donation drop-off and tell her you have put them up for adoption.
They are simply things...
things that often create a negative feeling when you think about them.
Minimalism in the strictest sense is all about keeping only what is necessary for life.
However, most of us have emotional attachments to at least one item in our home, making minimalism not only impractical, but unappealing.
However, the idea of de-cluttering your life begins by recognizing that there are things in your home that you do not need and probably do not even want, but you hang onto them for some reason that you may not even be able to easily explain to yourself.
When you can recognize that not every thing you own is necessary for your current or future happiness, you are ready to take the first tangible step toward de-cluttering your home and possibly even your life.
To find out more, read De-Cluttering Part 2: The Miracle of Sorting Bins.