WOW.
So today I used my lunch break to attend a sample sale.
I suppose I should actually say "today I surrendered my lunch break to battle other women, to the death if necessary, for discount fashion at a sample sale".
But that would be putting it lightly.
I should be a pro at this by now, I've been to enough sample sales to know all the ins and outs, and there are a few truths I've learned over the years.
You will always get caught in a stampede.
You will always watch your fellow shoppers (aka competition) like a hawk.
You will always want whatever the person next to you picks up.
You will always do more than 2 rounds.
You will always buy more than you need.
There are tricks to not only surviving the sample sale, but also to coming out the victor (with minimal bruising)! 1) Get there well before it opens, if the time says from 12 - 2, get there at 10! 2) Get in as fast as you can, but avoid the obvious path, this will be rapidly filled with running, screaming maniacs who will trample you to death.
3) Know what you really want to buy, and go there first, heading for the closest rack is a rookie mistake.
4) GRAB EVERYTHING that could possibly be worth looking at, as much as your arms can hold (my left arm is shaking still from the weight it was carrying).
5) If your size is scarce, go for the stock with the best resale.
eBay baby! 6) Find a quiet spot to go through your armfuls and sort out what you really want to buy.
Put back anything that you could buy in store for a similar price, keep anything 70% off or higher.
7) Do not leave your goodies unattended, they will disappear.
8) Do not ask anyone to watch anything for you.
These women are not your friends, they will stab you in the back.
If people are making conversation with you, it's because they want what you're holding.
9) If you find yourself being indecisive, just buy it.
There's no room for fence-sitters in hell! 10) Do not waste time trying clothes on, another rookie mistake.
If it doesn't fit, then it either becomes a Christmas present for someone, or it goes on ebay.
11) And finally, have no regrets.
You came, you saw, you elbowed people in the face when it felt necessary, and you conquered.
I definitely conquered.
So today I used my lunch break to attend a sample sale.
I suppose I should actually say "today I surrendered my lunch break to battle other women, to the death if necessary, for discount fashion at a sample sale".
But that would be putting it lightly.
I should be a pro at this by now, I've been to enough sample sales to know all the ins and outs, and there are a few truths I've learned over the years.
You will always get caught in a stampede.
You will always watch your fellow shoppers (aka competition) like a hawk.
You will always want whatever the person next to you picks up.
You will always do more than 2 rounds.
You will always buy more than you need.
There are tricks to not only surviving the sample sale, but also to coming out the victor (with minimal bruising)! 1) Get there well before it opens, if the time says from 12 - 2, get there at 10! 2) Get in as fast as you can, but avoid the obvious path, this will be rapidly filled with running, screaming maniacs who will trample you to death.
3) Know what you really want to buy, and go there first, heading for the closest rack is a rookie mistake.
4) GRAB EVERYTHING that could possibly be worth looking at, as much as your arms can hold (my left arm is shaking still from the weight it was carrying).
5) If your size is scarce, go for the stock with the best resale.
eBay baby! 6) Find a quiet spot to go through your armfuls and sort out what you really want to buy.
Put back anything that you could buy in store for a similar price, keep anything 70% off or higher.
7) Do not leave your goodies unattended, they will disappear.
8) Do not ask anyone to watch anything for you.
These women are not your friends, they will stab you in the back.
If people are making conversation with you, it's because they want what you're holding.
9) If you find yourself being indecisive, just buy it.
There's no room for fence-sitters in hell! 10) Do not waste time trying clothes on, another rookie mistake.
If it doesn't fit, then it either becomes a Christmas present for someone, or it goes on ebay.
11) And finally, have no regrets.
You came, you saw, you elbowed people in the face when it felt necessary, and you conquered.
I definitely conquered.